We're Bad Because We Can Afford To Be
by iloveyou123
Summary: They shine brighter and better than anyone else, they sparkle like freshly opened champagne and gold chandeliers, and their crowns may be tarnished but they're still royalty-get ready for your first look into Westchester's elite. It won't be pretty.
1. Chapter 1

We're Bad Because We Can Afford To Be

They shine brighter and better than anyone else, they sparkle like freshly opened champagne and gold chandeliers, and their crowns may be tarnished but they're still royalty-get ready for your first look into Westchester's elite. It's not going to be pretty.

::

_A here, ready to give you all the information you don't have about the richest and hottest kids in Westchester. These kids have more secrets than you have money and more money than you have- well, anything. But they're not as perfect as this town would like to portray them as. And lucky for you, I'm about to ruin their pretty little lives. Why, you might ask? Because they deserve it. These kids get anything and everything they want, and it's all about to come crashing down. Get ready for you first look into Westchester's elite. It's not going to be pretty._

_::  
_

[main cast]

::

C.A.M. fisher

"Dude, I think it's pretty obvious but you're almost definitely gonna fail the S.A.T's if you _don't take them._"

Cam laughs. "I'm not going to be the one taking them."

"I think that's illegal."

"Everything's legal if you don't get caught."

_The bad boy of Westchester Academy. Fucks girls and leaves them, and doesn't take no for answer- which would be a problem if anyone ever SAID no. Likes lots of things but has said on occasion, usually to his best friend Derrick Harrington, "I love three things, Derrick. Girls, money, and you." Is often seen with a girl, usually bottle blond and trashy, and his best friend, occasionally his best friend's girlfriend, Claire Lyons or the other bad kid of W.A, Massie Block. Doesn't believe in relationships, though many have tried to sway him._

_He's darker than dark, has more detentions than you have fake editions of the latest Chanel purse, and never, ever, fucks a girl more than once. Well- he didn't used to..._

DERRICK harrington

"So, you and Claire done the deed yet?"

"What- who says done the deed anymore?"

"Well, that's a no."

"Shut up. You're a bad friend."

"I'll warm her up for you, if you want..."

"I'll kill you!"

_One half of the golden pair of Westchester Academny, Derrick Harrington is the classic good guy. Does his homework, takes care of his family, and never cheats on his girlfriend- though that doesn't stop half the female population from trying to get him to. But no, he's never strayed. He's on the soccer team, currently as goalie and captain, and is on his way to a scholarship straight to any school his little blond head desires, not that his father's money wouldn't have gotten him in, anyway._

_But Derrick has some skeletons hidden in his closet. After all, we all do, don't we? But be careful, "Derrington", your secrets might not stay secrets for long... not if I have anything to say about it._

CLAIRE lyons

"Yes, well, unlike you, Mass, I don't really like getting drunk on the weekends, smoking up-"

"No one calls it that anymore-"

"OR trying cocaine because it's "better than any diet". I don't like doing that stuff and you know it!"  
"We have to keep up our image, C. We're the hottest chicks here, we've gotta go to the parties, show them all what they're missing.."

_"_I have a boyfriend."

"So?"

"Wow."

"There's a bitch _and _a tramp hidden in your tiny, size-zero body- by the way, hate you for that- and we are going to find it by the end of this year."

_The OTHER half of the golden duo, Claire Lyons is America's (or Westchester's) sweetheart. She's the virginal type, though, which is unfortunate for D, but we've heard a rumor that C is going to reward him for his patience- soon. Use protection, kiddos, we all know what can happen when you don't..._

_I've also heard some strange rumors that C's gotten her lovely body through less than lovely ways- as in not working out, but perhaps throwing up? Nah, seems unlikely- but hey, the wildest rumors tend to always have a grain of truth to them. After all, what is it they say? Where's the smoke, there's always fire. Better watch out, C. You never know who's watching. And what exactly they'll tell.._

MASSIE block

"Come on, it'll be fun..."

"Claire, there are three things that are essential for anyone having fun, ever: drugs, sex, or boys. Will this include any of the aforementioned three?"  
"Ooh, good use of aforementioned. And, well, I thought we could have a girl's night in, you know? Movies, popcorn, painting our nails... we haven't done that in FOREVER."

"That's because it's lame. Now, let's go."  
"What- where?"

"I'm going to show you how us big kids have fun. Prepare yourself; these things can get rough..."

_The play__**girl **__of Westchester Academy, Massie Block is rarely seen without the following three: her best friend Claire, a cigarette, or a boy. And she's not very picky about the last one- in fact, M's the opposite of picky, but hey, that doesn't mean she doesn't have high standards. Except it does. Compared to Claire, she's the whore of W.A, and it doesn't bother her at all. Enjoys sex, drugs, plotting revenge with her favorite partner in crime, the one Cam Fisher, and ditching class. How does she get away with all this? Rumor has it, her daddy has paid for the new library AND the renovated science lab. She doesn't like commitment, and has issues having sex with anyone twice- or at least, that USED to be a problem. Is our favorite little slut changing her ways? Doubt it. But as Massie herself likes to say "You don't know bad until you've met me"... and I'll be here to see just how bad things get._

::_  
_

[minor players]

::

CHRIS plovert: has had a secret crush on Claire for years.. will he ever do anything about it? Considering Derrick's one of his close friends, I don't think so.. but who knows? Maybe Plovert will man up- or maybe he won't even have to. Claire and him spend a lot of time together already, I've even heard her say "He's such a sweetheart, you know, and one of my really good friends." Looks like he might get lucky- but considering how long D's been trying, he might want to keep both fingers crossed.

ALICIA rivera: Plovert's best friend and confidant, she's always been pretty good friends with Massie- but for some reason she keeps her distance from Claire... it's obvious she knows all about Plovert's feelings for Claire (maybe in detail- ew!) but is there something Alicia's not telling him? Maybe she doesn't even know, but I know all of you better than you know yourselves, and Alicia's no exception. I'm sensing some romantic feelings on one side, though lately it seems Alicia's taken on Massie's policy in life: drink and have sex, anytime you possibly can. Maybe I'm wrong- but somehow, I don't think I am.

::

[the villans]

::

JOSH hotz: has a thing for Massie, and I mean a "want to fuck you" kind of thing. But it's well known Massie doesn't do anyone twice (except for possibly one exception). Looks like he has a plan though, and a partner,

LAYNE abeley: had sex with Cam Fisher one time, and wants to do it again. Claims she has an itch only he can scratch. And her and J have teamed up to get their respective wet dreams to become realities- best of luck to both of them, I suppose. Though could there be romance stewing for this attractive, scheming duo? They're both hot people, and while they're waiting for their fantasies, they could always use one another...

::

[extras]

::

HARRIS fisher: Cam's older brother who Massie's always had a thing for. Maybe there's a reason for that... perhaps his resemblance to the younger Fisher?

SKYE hamilton: the one girl Harris can't have. But definitely wants.

DYLAN marvil: Head of the celibacy club. Friends with Claire, enemies with Massie. Has a few dark secrets she really doesn't want to share... but she might end up having to.

KEMP hurley: The school perv. Friends with Cam, dislikes Derrington. Has a not totally confirmed, but definitely suspected thing for Dylan. The two have a weird rivalry/friendship, and tons of chemistry.

::

_And who am I? Well, that's one secret I'll never tell... but it's the only one. Watch out, Westchester, because everything you thought would never get out- let's just say: think again._

_xoxo,_

_A_

_::  
_

a/n: Okay, so this trailer is kind of a weird mix-up of Gossip Girl and Pretty Little Liars, but I promise you, besides "A" being a gossip-girl esque type of messenger, that's where the similarities end. Please review, I wanna know what you thought! and it might, MIGHT be continued.. just started another chapter story that I want to keep going called "The Whole World Knows What You Did Last Night" so I don't know..


	2. act one, scene one

sorry it's so short! i just wanted to post something to get it started and i couldn't get inspired enough to make it longer :/ the next chapter will be better, i promise :)

btw, um, **Cela Fille**, i'm sorry but in this story, most of the school calls the main four "the legacies" and that's sort of stolen from your story **If The World Is Ending, We're Throwing The Party**- i'm so sorry! i realized that after i wrote it, so if you want me to change it, just say the word and i will.

::

_cl; mb; cf; dh- otherwise known as "the group"- or at least, that's what they call themselves. the rest of the school has many different nicknames for them, the most popular being "the legacies". a lot of the other nicknames for these four...well, they're not as kind, let me tell you._

::

It starts with a note on her textbook. Claire looks around suspiciously, because she's pretty sure no one was near her locker that recently and it's not really that big of a school, but there's always a chance- nope, no one.

She slowly opens the lined paper, as it was folded in some sloppy triangle, as if the person didn't have enough time to fold it properly.

"Oh. My. Effing. God."

:::

"Massie Victoria Block!"

Massie rolls her head back and sees Claire approaching her, looking more freaked out than Derrick when he's studying for finals. She smirks and turns around.

"Claire-bear," She laughs, in her hoarse voice that sends most of the male population to their knees, "What's up?"

Claire ignores her and shoves some crumpled piece of paper in her face. "What the fuck, C?" Claire ignores her (not even admonishing her blatant swearing) and just shakes the note in her face, once again.

Massie looks at it in disinterest, but once she actually sees what words are written on it-

"Who wrote this to you?" She questions, her tone worried. Claire smiles inside, she (and the two others in their group, Cam and Derrick) are the only ones that get to see Massie like this, motherly, maternal- warm. It's lovely, and so rare, and it makes her happy because Massie is always so cold, to scare away people and it's nice to ssee that she cares.

"I don't know. It was on my textbook."

"Your textbook… that was in your locker?"

"Yeah, I know. Weird, right?" And that is bothering her, how did someone get this taped on her textbook? She supposes they could have slipped it in but it'd be incredibly lucky.

"Fucking hell." Massie says and pulls out a cigarette.

"Well," she sighs, getting up, "let's go find Derrick."

Claire starts, "Derrick?", her voice going up high at the ends.

Massie rolls her eyes. "Yes. Derrick. Your boyfriend." She starts walking ahead of her and mutters,

"And people say you're the smart one. Jesus, Claire, come on!" she beckons her forward. Claire follows.

::

"Hey, Harrington." Massie calls. "Get over here!"

He looks up and grins, waves to them and trots over. Derrick wraps his arm around Claire's waist the second he gets near enough.

"Hey, Mass." He smiles at her, then turns his attention back to Claire. "Hey, sweetheart, what's up?"

Massie rolls her eyes good naturedly at the lovebirds (as her and Cam call them, or when it's just the two of them, the losers) and says,

"Claire got a note today."

Derrick raises his eyebrows suspiciously. "A love note? From who? Don't even hesitate Claire, I'll kick his ass, just tell me his name-"

Claire laughs, a tinkling beautiful laugh and pushes his arm off playfully.

"Shut up," She giggles, "God, you're so clingy!" He does his practically patented puppy dog face at her, and she smiles at him.

Massie intervenes again,

"Not a love note, crazy boyfriend, it's weirder than that. And I'm actually slightly freaked out by this." He raises his eyebrows- Massie hardly ever shows emotions (well, besides "anger" and "bored").

Derrick gestures towards her. "Well, show me!"

She hands it over and his eyes widen.

"CAM!" He yells, full throttle and the playboy starts running over from the soccer fields (the only sport he's deemed "sexy enough" for him to play- Massie had made fun of him for a week after he said that, only stopping when Cam told her he'd buy her a month's worth of cigarette packs).

"Yeah?" He says, wiping the sweat from his forehead (Claire swears she sees ten girls swoon).

"Look at this note C got." Derrick says, wasting no time and basically shoving the note in his face (well, Claire did do the same thing to Massie, it was only fair).

Cam looks at for a few seconds, then gazes worriedly at Claire.

"Holy shit."

_Claire: saw you going into the bathroom after lunch. Be careful- we wouldn't want any ugly old habits to start rearing their heads, would we? _

_-A._

Holy shit, indeed.

::

review and you'll get a free picture of Cam playing soccer *winks*


	3. there's one minute of your day

there's one minute of your day

::

_there is a corner of your heart_

_just for me_

::

**massie block.**

(_and what's this? looks like our darling of the social scene is losing some of her power- she hasn't been seen out in three nights. not that she cares what we think, of course. but be careful, m! i'm starting to get worried._)

::

Massie pulls out a cigarette, inhales.

She likes this city, sometimes, likes the peacefulness of her park bench and the trees and the whisper of wind against her hair, likes the way the smoke disappears from her mouth and floats away until she can no longer see it.

She leans her head back, stares at nothing for a while. Inhales and exhales smoke upside down. She watches it as it curls away from her. Massie breathes in the cold air, breathes in and thinks about what's been going on the last couple of days, why it's been bothering her so deeply.

Because Massie fucking Block doesn't get bothered, she's way too awesome for that- as her and Cam like to say, they're the bad-ass twins and Claire and Derrick are the losers (though she _knows _Cam is the one who came up with the idea for Derrick to take Claire on a ferry ride around the city, she just can't get him to admit it- he was way too proud for anyone but him to have thought of it).

_i'll follow you until you love me, papa- paparazzi. _Fuck. She needs to change that ringtone, it's _loud._

She twists in her seat, flips open her buzzing phone.

She rolls her eyes. Stupid fucking website, sending her fucking alerts. Fucking... fuck. Massie doesn't like this, doesn't like people knowing so much about her, doesn't like these notes and certainly doesn't like seeing pictures of _her and her friends_ and getting alerts about it. Like she cares what they do (besides the group, she really doesn't), if she wanted to see them she would hang out with them.

She had learned about the website from Alicia, who had been freaking out because there was a picture of her on it and had said to Massie,

"You'll probably be on there again soon."

And Massie had done a double take, said,

"What? Again?"

"Yeah." Alicia had nodded, gesturing towards her phone. "You know. People take pictures of like, the rich kids or the cool kids, I guess and you've been on there like five times already."

"Mhmm." Massie hums. "I don't really know how I feel about that."

Alicia had rolled her eyes and laughed. "You don't have to care. It's just like... for people who are jealous or something. But the chick who runs this-"

Her eyes had snapped to Alicia. "Someone's _running _this?"

"Yep." She'd affirmed. "This chick, _A, _or whatever-"  
"_A?_" And then Massie had told her she had to go, and ran.

(because that was too much too fast too _weird_ and Massie doesn't know if she likes this, people knowing about her, and this _A, _knowing so much and it would scare her if she got scared and it kind of is, anyway).

All of the sudden, Massie hears laughter, a girl's laughter and whips around, her cigarette falling out of her hand. She doesn't see anything.

She sighs, leans back, but when she pulls out her lighter, she stops, stares- there's a note. There's a freaking _note _on her lighter.

_whatcha been up to, m? you seem a little...frazzled, to me._

_just looking out for your health._

_A._

"Motherfu-"

::

"So you got one too, then?" Claire asks, her big blue eyes transfixed on Massie.

"Yep." She says, bobbing her head.

Claire's mouth drops open and her eyes widen. She looks around frantically, as if someone could be watching them or something (which, Massie thinks, could be true considering they're getting notes that one second aren't there, and then the next..).

"Do you think.." She trails off. Massie raises an eyebrow.

"Do I think.. what?" She pulls out a cigarette (because honestly, this whole thing is stressful- maybe she should have made Cam buy her two month's worth) but Claire like, fucking karate chops her hand and the stick goes flying.

Massie looks at her, astonished.

"Claire, what the hell?"

She shrugs her tiny shoulders. "You can't. Smoke. In my. Room."

Massie just glares at her. Claire rolls her eyes.

"Oh, come on. Haven't we gone over this before?" She gestures to her room. "Look at this. It's..immaculate," she says, pulling out one of her useful SAT words. "It's gorgeous. All thanks to Mom and Dad's lovely bank account, and their decorators, of course. Now, do I want you ruining this? No. So that means: no. Smoking." She pauses for dramatic effects, Massie scoffs.

"Ever!" Claire yells.

Massie groans, and rolls on her side. "Ugh. You suck. Anyways, what were you saying? 'Do I think..' What?"

"Oh!" Claire pulls a pillow into her lap. "Do you think we should tell the guys?" She asks, her gaze worried.

Massie gives her a weird look.

"Um.. yes?" She questions. Claire frowns at her.

"What? I don't know. Sure, let's tell them. But you should know beforehand, Derrick will get crazy overprotective and Cam will too, but he'll do it in a weird way so he doesn't have to admit he cares too much and then they'll team up and never let us out of their sights. Now." She says, mimicking Claire's earlier tone, Claire sticks her tongue out at her.

"Do you want your boyfriend to become your dad?" Claire throws the pillow at her.

"Hey!" Massie says, laughing and then, in a completely clumsy move she will later deny to anyone who asks (Cam, mostly, with the phrase "naked pillow fight" involved), she falls off the bed and collapses on the floor.

Soon, Claire joins her, laughing and gasping words like, "You-" "-just fell-" "-oh my god, I'm telling Cam!" Cam, because she knows how Massie and Cam, being so similar, have a history of trying to one up and embarrass each other.

Massie hits her with the pillow extra hard, and Claire threatens to throw her cigarettes out the window.

It's nice, Massie thinks, to have fun with Claire, because they basically never get to anymore- Massie goes out on the weekends, sometime teaming up with Cam, and Derrick and Claire hang out and be all... couple-y, and Claire's been so busy with SAT prep and school and Massie's been so busy with.. not those things.

Then Claire grabs Massie's hand.

"So," She whispers, "Just us, then? We don't tell anyone else?"

Massie links their fingers.

"Yeah." She sighs. "Just us."

::

_i will pack my bags_

_just to stay in the corner of your heart_

::

I AM SO SORRY I TOOK SO LONG.

but.. um, **coughs** did you like it? this wasn't very interesting, and wayy too short, i know, but i wanted to establish some things- claire and massie's friendship, cam and massie's similarities and relationship, and the website & notes that they'll be getting. btw, the song is 'corner of your heart' by ingrid michealson. really lovely song & i think it describes claire & massie's relationship really well. listen to it! :)

also: review. yeah? or i'll go all claire on your ass and karate chop you.

i'll update soon, i swear. and next chapter is gonna be something w/ plovert and alicia/layne josh.


	4. one new message, unread

**a/n: **okay, okay, I lied. This is NOT gonna be an alicia/chris/layne/josh chapter. I'm sorry! But this is going to be a pretty big Clairington chapter- so yay? Maybe? Though you probably won't be thanking me when it's over :/

* * *

::

_what's the story, morning glory?_

_i feel so low and worthless, yeah_

::

_Claire and Derrick. The schools golden couple. Perfect in every way, shape, and form. But nothing can stay perfect forever. Wonder what's in store for our lovely blondes? I, for one, am dying to find out._

::

Claire wakes up to her alarm ringing incredibly annoyingly, and she decides to throw the nearest thing at it.

_CRASH. _Oops. Too bad the nearest thing was her cell phone.

"Claire, darling, what's going on up there?" Her mother trills. Claire rolls her eyes and pulls herself up from the bed.

"Nothing, Mom." She reassures her, and goes about doing her morning routine- shower, brush teeth, make up, clothes, breakfast.

She does this all relatively fast, considering (looking at the clock she probably just broke and/or severely damaged) she's like ten minutes later than usual.

"Oh, god. Massie!" She yells to no one, picking up the discarded cigarette she finds in her bathroom. Claire picks up her cellphone and decides to call her (she's probably not even awake yet, knowing her).

"Mass."

"Huh?"

"Massie. It's Claire."

"What?"

"You know. Claire. 'Claire-bear.' The person you have spent practically every day with since you were SEVEN."

"Claire?"

"Oh, hi, Massie."

"Why are you... um, calling?"

"Get up. And then come pick me up. In..." She checks the half smashed clock. "I'm gonna say ten. And I mean minutes, Massie, NOT hours, like last time. Also, stop smoking in my bathroom! Just cause you do it when I'm not around doesn't mean I won't find out!"

Massie mutters something then hangs up.

Claire decides not to ask what she was mumbling about, she probably doesn't want to know what she said anyway.

::

Claire slides out of Massie's limo, and immediately scans the crowd of students milling around for Derrick. She blushes when she sees Massie laughing at her, but Claire just threatens to steal her cigarettes and she stops right away (it is really good sometimes to know Massie's weak spot). She smiles when she sees the familiar dark and light heads walking their way over to them. Derrick runs up to her and hugs her, spinning her around.

"Knock it off!" She laughs, and he sets her back down.

"How are you?" He says, mock seriously and she ruffles his hair, running two hands through it. She can kind of hear Massie and Cam's conversation, and they're basically talking about- wait, what?

"What, you two?" Massie and Cam stop talking right away, and look at her sheepishly.

Derrick raises an eyebrow. "Are you guys planning something?"

"No." They say in unison.

"Hm. Of course not." Claire says, and rolls her eyes. "Whatever, guys, go back to talking about having sex with a TEACHER before school ends. I can assure you we'll be the ones who tell the police."

Massie and Cam stare at her for a few seconds, then go back to talking, Cam helping Massie light a smoke.

"God, those two are going to get killed, or arrested, or arrested AND killed, or raped or-"

Derrick kisses her.

She pulls back, giggling (shut up). "What was that for?"  
He slings one arm around her shoulders. "M and C can take great care of themselves. They'll be fine. You're the only C _I _plan on worrying about."

She stood on her tiptoes to kiss his cheek. "Aww. That's adorable!" She laughs, and pats him on the head. He smirks at her, and tries to spin her around again.

"Jerk!" She yells, and he tries to chase her, but she does her sad face, and he stops.

He reaches for her hand, and she links their fingers before they walk into school.

::

Claire leaves Derrick before going into her homeroom with the words, "I love you," and "See you later," on her lips.

He grins at her, and squeezes her hand. "Love you too, babe. See you."

She walks into her classroom, and her smile doesn't leave her face for about five minutes.

::

Derrick walks away still in a really good mood, and almost laughs at the other guys jealous expressions. Yeah. He does have a hot girlfriend. Suck it. He just waves at a few, and keeps carrying on.

He hears a chiming sound coming out of his pocket- it's echoed around the hall, he sees kids taking out the cellphones. A lot of them have shocked looks on their faces. He arches an eyebrow and pulls out his phone.

_To: Everyone._

_From: A._

_Message:_

_What did I say before, children? Nothing stays perfect for long. Well, I'm about to prove myself totally, completely right. And there is absolutely no more delicious way to do it than this:_

Derrick can't move for exactly 31 one seconds. (he counts.)

_That is correct, kiddos. The image you see in front of your eyes? It really is a picture of **Derrick Harrington** CHEATING on his long time girlfriend Claire Lyons._

_Oh, before you start defending yourself, Derrington, sweetheart, there is no way this is a fake. And you know it. Claire- I truly am sorry. If by sorry, I mean delighted. But C, you only have yourself to blame. Leaving such a hot guy alone? You really should have known better._

::

Claire walks out of her classroom to a lot more whispering than usual. And there's usually a pretty good amount of whispering. She looks around suspiciously, than keeps walking to her locker.

She slides her science book in, and pulls out her phone.

_ONE NEW MESSAGE._

(When she looks back on it, she _should_ have known. A was right. Nothing stays perfect.)

::

Derrick slams his locker shut and Claire's face appears behind it.

"Claire-"

"No. Shut up. Shut up! How the _hell _are you going to explain this to me?"

"Claire, you don't know- I was, it was a mistake! A complete mistake! It just- she came onto me and nothing was supposed to happen, it was an accident-"

"When was this?"

"I-"

"_Tell me!_"

"Registration day."

"At this school? Two months ago? Oh my god. Oh my god." She puts her head in her hands. "I can't believe this. I can't... Oh my _effing_ god."

"Claire, it was- it was a mistake! Okay? One time. Just once."

"Two months. You didn't tell me for two months."

"Claire.."

She starts to walk away from him, he follows her. "Claire! Where are you going?"

She keeps going, walking towards the exit that leads towards the balcony.

"No! Claire? _Claire!_"

He pushes open the doors after her. She's standing on the steps leading up to the railing.

"Oh god, Claire, you can't, please, no-"

"Everything's so fragile." She whispers, pausing and just standing right before the rails.

"Don't you get that?" Claire says, her hair whipping around her face, her eyes looking through him. "I could be dead in a second."

"I was stupid, and immature, and it was a mistake, Claire! Please, you have to listen to me, I love you. I love _only_ you!"

He feels something crack open inside him, break. She looks away.

"It doesn't matter anymore."

She turns around and starts walking down and past him. He reaches out for her. She wrenches her arm away from him.

"Claire-"

"The next time you see me, don't talk to me."

She doesn't look back.

::

Claire doesn't think about anything when she rushes home and pulls out the cake her mother had been saving for a "special occasion" but had forgotten about one day after making it. She doesn't think about anything when she starts shoving pieces of it in her mouth. She doesn't think about anything when she licks frosting from her fingers, or when she licks crumbs from the bottom of the plate. She doesn't think about anything when she races up to her bathroom and slams the door behind her.

And she definitely doesn't think about anything when she sticks two fingers down her throat.

(all she can hear in her head is _I love you I love you I love you _and all she can see is that picture, even when she closes her eyes.)

::

Claire doesn't even start when she hears someone slam the door behind them and footsteps racing.

"Claire!"

And in a second, Massie's sitting right next to her, her dark her mingling with Claire's golden.

Claire starts hiccuping and sobbing. "Mass, he- he, he cheated on- he had sex with-"

Massie audibly gasps (if Claire was in a better mood she'd tease her about it).

"Derrick?"

Claire nods, her hands gripping the white porcelain.

"Oh my fucking- oh, Claire-bear. I'm so... I can't. Derrick? Are you- are you positive?"

"He cheated on me. He said he loved me and then he took it back by fu- _fucking_ that girl. Didn't you check your phone?" She snaps.

"Claire.." Massie says. "No, my phone's dead. I didn't think-"

"I hate him."

Massie takes her hand.

"I know. It's okay. I know."

Claire sobs, her head hitting the rim.

"What do you do, Mass? When someone you love just- they really screw you over? How do you get past it?"

She strokes Claire's hair, and leans her head against Claire's shoulder.

"Well, I guess... I guess you've got to stop loving them."

Claire takes a deep breath. "And is that possible?"

Massie frowns. "I really don't know, Claire. Is it?"

She doesn't have an answer.

::

"It was my fault. I know. I know."

Cam looks at him, eyes stony and cigarette dangling out of his mouth.

"You fucked another girl."

Derrick glances up, eyes wide and wild, hands pulling at his hair.

"I know! God, I just. I fucking.. I was scared."

Cam rolls his eyes. "You're always scared. And that's a really pussy thing to say."

"She needs to forgive me." Derrick says.

"No." Cam replies, "She doesn't. And she won't. It's _Claire_, she's not going to think this is okay. Or forgivable. And besides that, what the fuck, dude? I thought you were in love with her." He puts air quotes around the word love.

"I am."

There's a pause. Cam laughs.

"You're a fucking idiot."

Derrick doesn't say anything, but the words _I know _are implied.

::

_well i would really like to kiss you_

_but i guess i'm in no condition_

::

* * *

i hope you liked? well, not liked, considering what i just put claire and derrick through. review, and it makes me write faster! ;) btw, first lyrics are from the song "it's my own cheating heart that makes me cry" and the second lyrics are from the song "this scene is dead" by the scientists.


	5. take me out

take me out

_

* * *

_

_i'm just a shot away from you_

* * *

Massie's first thought the morning she wakes up is _where am i?_

(which is, admittedly, not an _uncommon _thought for her… but, you know. Different circumstances, obviously.)

It doesn't take her very long to figure it out, and the pictures on the wall of her and Claire help a little.

She groans, rolls over. Her legs dangle off the edge of the bed.

Claire leans next to her, the blonde's hair mussed and faint lines of faded tear tracks still on her porcelain skin.

Her eyes flutter open, she looks around. Massie pushes herself up, her elbows pressing into the comforter.

"Hey, kid." She says. Claire just stares at her.

"Wait-" The blonde asks hopefully, "So was Friday just a horrible nightmare and actually I only hung out with you where you probably drugged me so I'd hallucinate?"

Massie frowns at her. "So it's 'only' hanging out with me now? Nice, C. Also, I'm offended. I would never let you hallucinate!" She pauses. "And sadly…" She trails off. Claire nods.

"Yeah," She says quietly, "I thought so."

She reaches for Claire's hand, but Claire just smiles slightly and moves away.

"We should get ready for school, Massie-kur." She jokes, throwing a shirt and jeans at Massie. She cringes, remembering her screen name from seventh grade.

"You promised you'd never bring that up again." Massie warns her.

"Change." Claire tells her.

The blonde girl pulls off her shirt, and Massie almost does a double take. She looks thin, and not in a nice way, in a _too skinny _way, a bad way.

"Claire?" Massie asks, and Claire looks at her confused, because Massie sounds almost hesitant and that is definitely not normal for the beautiful brunette.

"Yeah?" She asks. Claire pulls a halter top on that Massie thinks used to be hers.

The second she pulls the shirt on, Massie shakes her head. Claire has an almost happy expression on and Massie will not ruin that, not today. Plus, she could easily be wrong. It's happened before (though Cam likes to claim it's happened more than once or twice).

Claire and Massie start walking out of the room, and Massie pulls out a cigarette. Claire whips her head around when she hears the crackling sound of the lighter.

She punches the girl in the arm, and takes her cigarette.

"What did I tell you?" Claire asks, a smirk on her face.

Massie laughs.

::

_so, looks like our favorite play boy has been seen out a lot in the past few days, usually (surprisingly) in the company of D, instead of M. helping D get over his.. C blues? i personally think C deserves the partying chance, but maybe M will take her out one of these days. god knows it's about time._

_in happier news (or just more interesting), i've noticed C and M are sharing a lot of meaningful looks lately. is it just me, or is there some secret romance stewing? _

_perhaps i'm just being hopeful._

_-A_

::

"Hey, Josh."

Josh Hotz looks up, a smile breaking out onto his face when he sees his best friend, and partner in crime, Layne Abeley.

"Laynie!" He replies.

She sits down next to him, their twin tan legs hanging off the edge of the building.

"Still have no idea why you like it up here." She remarked.

He smirks. "It's the school's roof, what's not to like?"

Layne rolls her eyes. "Um, it's the school- do I need any other reasons?"

He doesn't answer. It's peaceful, up here, and he likes the way the wind blows Layne's dark hair against her skin, the way her hand rests right next to his.

"So, wanna talk about our plan, or just wanna keep sitting up here like a gay depressed poet?"

Josh tilts his head back, laughs long and loud. "You're a freak." He says affectionately. "And yeah... the plan."

The plan: to sleep with Massie Block and Cam Fisher again, respectively.

He actually wasn't that excited about the plan, and he's still not, really. But Layne wants to do it, and he can't really refuse her because him, refusing sex? She'd admit him to the hospital. Or punch him. Maybe both.

"What _do _you have planned, exactly?" He questions curiously.

Layne raises one eyebrow and grins at him.

"Well, let's see…"

::

_TO: CAMILLA FISHER_

_FROM: MASSIE (KUR) BLOCK_

_MESSAGE: _

_hey, loser, what'd you DO with Derrington? taking him to clubs? wtf? fix this. FIX THIS NOW, douchebag. if he has sex with anyone OTHER than claire, i'll fucking kill you._

::

Dylan Marvil seriously considers the possibility that God has it out for her when she looks at the board on her class room wall this morning. She grabs the silver cross that hangs from her neck and wonders if saying a prayer would change anything.

They have a five month research project, and her partner is-

"Kemp." Dylan fake smiles at the pervert when he walks up to her. "What a nice surprise."

"Babe, you always get a surprise when you hang with the Kemp." He says, winking at her. She grimaces.

Kemp pulls out the chair next to her and sits down.

"I can't believe I got paired with you." She mutters angrily. He smiles a little, puts his arm around her.

Dylan almost laughs at him, and shrugs him off. "Idiot."

"Get used to it, Dyl-pickle. We're gonna be working together for the next five months… It just makes my heart leap."

She frowns. "Yeah, and other parts of your body too, I'm sure."

Kemp chuckles. This is why she's his favorite conquest- one, she's a challenge, and _two, _she is the only one who can fight verbally (and sometimes physically) with him.

"You rock." He says admiringly.

She won't admit it, but it does kind of flatter her that he likes her. Then she pretends she never even had that thought, because that's insane. He's trash! A loser, pervert, sex addicted, _freak! _And that will not change, no matter how sort of cute and muscly he may be.

"So, are we going to have to study in depth for this project? Maybe the anatomy?"

She hits him in the arm, and turns back to the front. "First of all, this is not a science class, this is an english one, and just stop hoping, Kemp. It will never happen. Unlike all of your whores, I have class."

Kemp puts his hand on her thigh. "They all say they have class until they get with this. And then they're lining up for it, again and again."

She smirks coldly, and removes his hand from her leg.

Five months of this. It will be a surprise to her if she doesn't kill him.

She thinks God would forgive her.

::

_TO: MASSIE (KUR) BLOCK_

_FROM: CAMILLA FISHER_

_MESSAGE:_

_you've been ditching me for the last two days, block, i had to resort to derrick! and stop being a bitch, he's already had sex with someone other than claire. and i'm NOT proud of him. you remember the pictures?_

_but what do you want us to do about it? idk if i CAN fix this. _

::

Derrick doesn't go to school on Monday. He wakes up in Cam's bedroom, face down with a bottle of vodka in his hand.

"Well, well, well." Cam's voice sounds out. "Sleeping Beauty awakes."

He groans and tries to get up, but apparently his legs are not doing well because they completely fail him. Cam rolls his eyes.

"Get up." He tells him, but ends up helping him up and onto the bed, anyway.

"You know," Cam says, "You're not going to win Claire dearest back by ditching class. For all she knows, you're off having sex with-"

Derrick growls at him. "Don't say her name!"

"Aww." Cam fake pouts. "Does it hurt too much? You'd think it would hurt when I say Claire's name."

He sighs, his head in his hands. "It doesn't hurt when you say her name, it makes me angry, fucking pissed. And of course it hurts when I hear Claire, but I love her! Okay? So, I still want to hear it!"

Cam raises an eyebrow. Derrick shrugs. "I know that doesn't make much sense."

"No," The other boy says, "Not particularly. But screw your issues for today. Being the awesome motherfucker I am, I've decided you can stay here for the day. Sober up. Clean up. _Shower _up." He makes a disgusted face. "And then, tomorrow, you'll go to school with flowers and a teddy bear or some shit like that, and it'll all be fine."

Derrick falls backwards. His head hits the pillow. "I don't think it'll be fine, Cam. I think she might hate me. Legit, hate me."

Cam hits him. "Then she hates you for a while. And then it's okay." He sighs, pauses.

"Give it time. I wouldn't want you to start dating her right away, she doesn't deserve that. But she loves you, you love her. _Legit._" He mocks.

Derrick laughs. "Thanks, man."

Cam rolls his eyes. "Get the fuck up."

So he does.

::

Claire looks down at her buzzing cellphone, hides it under her desk.

_TO: CLAIRE LYONS_

_FROM: CHRIS PLOVERT_

_MESSAGE:_

_Hey, Claire. I know you're probably still pissed and sad about Derrington, and I'm really sorry about that. It sucks what he did. But I was wondering if you wanted to hang out tomorrow? Maybe I can cheer you up? :)_

_Chris_

She actually smiles when she sees his text. Chris really was a good guy, and she needed more friends like that. God knows she loves Massie and Cam (she doesn't think about the fourth member of their stupid breakfast club, she won't, _won't_) but they can be… bad influences. Sometimes it's really nice to just be with people that get her, that like studying and staying at home if she feels like it.

Her fingers fly across the keyboard, looking up to see if the teacher's watching.

_TO: CHRIS PLOVERT_

_FROM: CLAIRE LYONS_

_MESSAGE:_

_hi chris! um, yeah, i'd love to hang out :) how bout 3:30, the cafe?_

She grins when he replies a few seconds later.

_TO: CLAIRE LYONS_

_FROM: CHRIS PLOVERT_

_MESSAGE:_

_Sounds good. Can't wait._

Claire feels warm and kind of bubbly. She realizes that maybe, she can't wait either.

* * *

_you say you don't know_

_i say_

_take me out_

* * *

tbc! hope you liked, and just so you know, this is two days after the last chapter, so it's the monday after the weekend.

review and kemp will tell you a cheesy pick up line ;) and then dylan will smack him for you.


	6. the last time we had this conversation

the last time we had this conversation

a/n: kind of stole the "i'll do anything" from naomily's storyline in S4. :) don't own clique/skins/etc. this was originally a one shot that i did post, but i figured, well, i haven't updated for for-fucking-ever and i like clairington's storyline in this fic, so... why not? :) hope ya like, and reviews are amazing. no, seriously. they're like crack w/o the drug part. ;)

* * *

_we're sewn together_

_(it's far too sacred)  
_

;;;;

_Well, C and D are still broken up. That's about it, really. You know, I thought they'd be fun when they split, but... they're just kind of boring. Like usual._

_Maybe if they weren't virgins they'd be more fun- oh, wait. Oops. ;)_

;;;;_  
_

Everything now is in pieces.

He fucked someone else. That's okay. She doesn't mind. Doesn't care. (It's not lying if you know you're doing it, right?)

Claire knows things are different. Things feel different. When she walks into a room, she doesn't look for him, even though she can feel him looking at her. And she thinks she could get past it, if she tried. If he tried. But he's _not. _He's waiting for her to say go, he's waiting for her confirmation- you can try now, you have my permission to start working, i think i could love you again.

But she doesn't know if she can.

;;;;

She's not sure why she goes out in the first place. She's even less sure why she stays. The air outside feels heavy. It feels like it's weighing her down, when she walks and stands in lines and pulls down the front of her shirt just to show skin.

It's that air that keeps her out at night, sometimes until four in the morning, later. Sometimes she doesn't go home at all. She can see all the couples in her mind, curled up under blankets at their homes, and it makes her drink the rest of her beer and throw the bottle in the distance. The sound of the glass breaking makes her think of explosions.

There, she thinks. Proof I can destroy things too.

(The smirk she wears feels entirely too out of place on her face. She didn't used to be this way.)

The drugs don't help either. When she's pressed up against the walls of the dirtyrottengrungy bathroom stalls, her head tilted to the side to let them bruise her skin, fingers gripping at her hips, she still thinks-

_oh. _

They are not Derrick.

And nothing's strong enough to make her forget.

;;;;

He leaves a note on her door. It looks like it's been done with crayon, and she can't say she's really surprised. The colors are bright against the oak.

It says: I'll do anything.

She leaves it taped to the doorbell for a week until she tears it down.

;;;;

Sometimes he smiles at her in the hallways, as if everything's okay.

(As if _anything _could _ever _be okay again.)

;;;;;

(She keeps the note tucked in her dresser, the top drawer. Sometimes it gets buried underneath papers and pencils and forgotten books, but then she'll dig it out again and look at it, folding it and unfolding it, running her hands over the creases. She thinks maybe staring at it will make it true again.

Claire thinks this note is a lie. What he did, the past, it can't be changed so really he can't do anything, he can only try to do anything and maybe it's not enough. Maybe that won't give Claire anything at all.

Her fingers dance across the faded words. The heart drawn in the middle is less red then it was before. It's been a few weeks.

She feels like every single day is a dream. It's not as real as they were before with Derrick and sometimes they feel more real. She worries that she's floating away, disappearing and someday she just won't be there anymore. As if she was in the middle of the ocean, and she just- sunk.

She doesn't know if she likes that idea or not.)

;;;;

They make out in the hallways like they're running out of time. He leaves bruises in the shape of him on her, and she pretends not to see them later. The worst part is, they can't stop completely. When he touches her she still feels like she's going to burst into flames.

He always slips away, resigned, like he knows- this still isn't enough. She wraps her arms around herself because she doesn't want him to get to see her anymore.

She wishes she could change things. She doesn't know how.

;;;;

Her skin always feels raw and he (still) feels like salvation.

It's fucking disgusting.

;;;;

She grabs the bouncer's dick to get into some club she doesn't remember the name of. Massie stares at her like she's scared. He leers at her, and tells her when he gets off (his shift).

She's looking past him.

I- She pauses, stutters. I'm not staying. And… I'm not coming back.

;;;;

(It's easy to ignore the people grinding up against her. The way their bones hit hers, sharp and hard. Sometimes they look at her like she should be different. She thinks maybe they're right.

And sometimes they try and kiss her, lean in and almost, almost, she wants to give in and respond.

She can't.

She doesn't think about why.)

;;;;

Claire remembers hearing a line somewhere. Maybe it was her English class in ninth grade, maybe it was some part of a song.

_I would trade a thousand tomorrows for one yesterday._

It sticks to her, as if written on her skin. She can't forget it.

Derrick doesn't call her anymore.

;;;;

Alicia and Claire don't talk a lot, considering the girl hates her, but she walks up to her outside anyway. Claire's standing by a tree. Alicia pulls out a pack of cigarettes, lights one for herself and doesn't offer one to Claire. It's alright, she wouldn't have taken it anyway.

Alicia exhales a stream of smoke. Hey. You okay? She asks. You look sort of… weird. She tilts her head, looking over Claire, as if it's the first time she's seen her.

Claire stares at the cigarette, the end lighting up. (Like a star exploding.)

I'm fine. She says, repeats it. I'm fine. I'm just sad, that's all.

Well, everyone's sad, Alicia replies and drops her cigarette to the ground and crushes it with her shoe.

;;;;

Derrick leaves another letter on her door. She doesn't wait to cut it up with scissors this time.

(She leaves the crumbled up parts in his driveway, and she rips the heart down the middle.)

;;;;

He sits next to her in class the next Monday.

Hey, he says, quietly. His voice is different then it used to be. Or maybe it's just been a while.

She puts one elbow on her desk.

There's a pop quiz today, Claire sighs.

;;;;

She says this instead of I love you.

;;;;


End file.
